Be Best?

I’m tired.

Tired from late night celebrations, tired from eating my weight in carbs and refined sugar, and tired of exerting entirely too much energy whilst doing my best in navigating the current state of humanity.

Sound dramatic? It is, but it doesn’t have to be – and it’s the reason my brain melts into my spinal cord.

2016 really changed my vision of what I thought America was/is capable of (and as a person who benefits from various degrees of privilege, I’m sure that makes some heads roll.) Most of you are aware of the saying “time flies when you’re having fun”, but you’re likely not aware of its little sister, “time flies when a petulant, delusional man-child who doesn’t understand reality is reading How to Install a Fascist Regime: for Dummies.”

2020 seemed light years away, yet, here we are.

I started this project as a form of therapy for myself - a more creative way to channel my negative energy, and an honest attempt to cut down on the high volume of vent sessions on social media. Although I am clearly a ‘libtard’, I have always genuinely believed in the two-thoughts approach, and have done my best to research real facts and opinions from many angles. Education is THE key ingredient in combating divisive rhetoric and the plague of false narratives being violently expelled from the anus on Dale and Debra’s faces. And by ‘education’ I mean asking questions and having actual conversations to learn more about topics you’re unfamiliar with (and therefore fear); not your degree from University of Phoenix.

That said, I know you’re all tired of grazing this holiday season, but here are a few treats to snack on for the road to November 3rd; things I’ve been forced to raise an overflowing glass of expensive bourbon to over the last 3 years:

• It’s great to be pro-life! But please don’t conveniently forget that ‘lives’ come in many types, shapes and sizes. For example: hearts also beat in small brown children locked in actual cages, separated from families, without proper nourishment or care. If your compassion for human life stops at the birth canal, you’re not actually pro-life – by fucking definition.

• Speaking of brown kids, next time your sphincter tightens because “this is America” and you heard someone speaking Spanish, think of how impressed you were with little Sally who attends the French Immersion school and can count and ask for basic needs in two languages. Brown kids have been speaking two languages in this country for decades, you can barely speak one. Why the anger? What’s the difference between Sally and Miguel? Oh….

• Liberalism is not a disease. Conservatism is not a disease. Blind (and apparently deaf) partisanship and loyalty is a disease. Its symptoms include, but are not limited to: vein-bursting outrage and death threats directed towards a teenager with Asperger syndrome with a passion and concern for the earth in response to scientifically proven climate change; yet peacefully sleeping like a full, dry baby after learning a bunch of old white dudes are having fuck parties with minors. There are literally hoards of people who need a pacemaker when faced with a 16 year old girl who is just like “hey, we should probably not be so sloppy? Maybe remove the trash from the ocean and be smarter about the container material and disposal of your frozen Hungry Man dinners.” Apparently THAT girl is a stupid child - but the teenage girls being fondled and penetrated by the Micropenises of America klan are grown, and giving sexual consent? If you don’t find the responses of those two really fucking weird and disturbing, you have the disease.

• I’ve most certainly exhausted myself on many facets of the firearms topic. But for good measure, no one is interested in rounding up your steel Viagra. We’re merely interested in more responsible gun ownership and less dead kids. But remember, legal weapons and conceal carry laws also apply to, sit down for this Dale…black people (even though I’m not so sure law enforcement got that memo.) You probably know that, but I have to remind you – because for some unknown (not really) reason, there seems to be deafening silence from gun enthusiasts when a black man or woman is shot in the face because they have a permitted firearm. Y’all need year-round sunscreen because you’re transparent as fuck.

• Lastly, for those claiming this fossilized skidmark is the Messiah - the only way God would send a fat, rich, incoherent, narcissistic, xenophobic dick sore as the ‘second coming’, is if it were a test. And if so, we are failing…miserably.
  

At this juncture, the face of America is petty, ignorant and embarrassing. Find the courage to venture outside of Taintville, USA – whether you are fortunate to be able to do that physically, or intellectually via books, documentaries, or even just conversations with people who have had different experiences than you. Perhaps if we all set aside 7 seconds to truly acknowledge the human element in our opinions, our politics, and even our immediate circles, we’ll be less apt to be paralyzed by fear and hypnotized by a weak, flaccid tyrant whose only strategy is to brainwash poor people into thinking that brown immigrants will take the jobs you don’t want or even have, and then rape your daughter (as it’s only ok for old white men to grab your pussy without consent, DUH.)

We don’t have to be ‘best’ – but we should ALL want to be better.